


Said I Wouldn't Call

by rocketshipsandradios



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Drinking to Cope, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-06
Updated: 2019-01-06
Packaged: 2019-10-05 08:43:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17321714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rocketshipsandradios/pseuds/rocketshipsandradios
Summary: Jason and Dick are fighting. Jason is falling back into old habits to deal with that. Dick is worried about his boyfriend.





	Said I Wouldn't Call

**Author's Note:**

> Musical (and title) Inspiration:  
> Give Me Love - Ed Sheeran  
> Need You Now - Lady Antebellum

He wasn't going to call him. That was pathetic. Dick had left for a reason and hearing from Jason would only make him remember those reasons.

No, if Jason wanted any chance at winning Dick back, he had to stay quiet. Fly under the radar.

He'd been lying on his bed, staring aimlessly at his phone screen for a solid forty-five minutes. With Dick's contact open, of course, willing himself not to hit the 'dial' button.

_“I can’t do this anymore Jason!”_

The words echoed in his head, only adding to the headache he’d developed from his incessant staring and over-thinking. Jason cringed slightly as his attention was ripped back to the internal battle he’d been having for what felt like hours now.

_Call him._

_This is ridiculous._

_He loved me._

_He hates me now._

_Just call him._

_And have him hate me more?_

Jason sat up, swung his legs over the side of the bed, and proceeded to throw his phone at the wall with a force that only the Red Hood could manage.

It didn't break. It never did, he wasn’t that lucky. That, and Dick had gotten him an unnecessarily protective phone case on his last birthday. As a matter of fact, this had been the third time that evening Jason had abused the wall with his phone.

His hands were screaming to go pick it up, to swallow his pride and call Dick, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. Instead, he turned and left the bedroom, heading to the kitchen of his apartment. If he wasn’t close to his phone, it seemed less likely he would actually use it.

Jason had meant to grab food, was actually acknowledging his appetite for the moment, but the alcohol caught his eye and he couldn't help but reach for a bottle of whiskey instead. He didn’t bother with a glass; he was drinking by himself, after all. The former Robin breathed a small sigh of relief as that familiar burn made its way down his throat.

Every time he thought Dick's name, every time he considered grabbing his phone, he took another drink. Needless to say, the bottle was gone fairly fast, although it hadn’t been full to start. Images were staring to blur, but it wasn’t from the alcohol. Somewhere between the halfway point and now, Jason had started crying, but he didn’t pay it any attention. He didn’t even wipe the tears from his face.

Some part of his mind insisted that if he just kept drinking, he’d forget Dick. He’d forget the sound of the door slamming as his boyfriend walked out. And he’d forget the ache in his chest.

Confused, hurt, and no longer thinking clearly, he picked up the empty bottle and stumbled back into his bedroom.

He sat on the bed for a bit, bouncing the bottle between both hands and glaring at the glass. Maybe he was silently hoping it would magically refill itself at some point; maybe it would do a better job this time. His thoughts were blurred and incomplete, but they were all still thoughts of Dick.

_Damn it._

Alcohol was what Jason had used for years to clear his head. It could get rid of any thoughts he was having. Any thoughts, apparently, except for thoughts of Dick Grayson. He still felt everything he had been trying to erase. There was a sudden smashing sound as the broken whiskey bottle joined Jason's phone on the floor; he didn’t even remember throwing it.

He wasn't supposed to be like this, he was Jason Todd. He was the Red Hood. Red Hood didn't cry over boys. This whole thing was pathetic. But it didn't really matter how many times he told himself that, he was still undoubtedly crying.

The urges that Jason had attempted to fight off with whiskey had only been increased. But now his resistance against them was gone, blurred by too many drinks. He was going to lose this battle against himself, and he knew it. If Dick had been there, he would have known it too.

_Call him._

_…Okay._

He tripped once on his way across the room, gripping onto any nearby furniture for support, but eventually made it to his phone. The phone wasn't shattered but the glass bottle certainly was and Jason was only vaguely aware of his left hand bleeding a bit as he reached into the mess. If the cut hurt, he didn’t feel it. The screen was still unlocked, Dick's phone number staring him in the face.

_He hates me when I'm drunk._

_Oops._

The line rang so many times after he dialed that he was starting to think Dick wasn't going to pick up. But just as he moved to throw the phone again, there was a very confused _"Jason?"_ heard from the other end.

Jason didn't say anything. He'd planned to; he'd planned to scream and yell and fight. But he didn't say anything for fear of losing control on the sobs he'd been holding back. He took a slow breath, sniffed a little as he did, and slid down the wall in a deafening silence.

_Hang up before Dick does._

_This is ridiculous._

_You look pathetic._

"...Jay, are you alright?"

Jason let out a small sound that wasn't a whimper but wasn't a sob either, just in an attempt to get some sound out of his throat.

"Dick...I-"

The 'I miss you' he was going to spit out vanished as soon as he started to say it. Jason blamed the alcohol but he also had a suspicion that he'd stopped because he knew Dick didn't want to hear it.

"I need you."

_Shit._

He hadn't meant to say that either, but his mental filter had apparently shattered about the same time as the whiskey bottle. Dick didn't respond right away, but Jason could practically hear him thinking through the phone, weighing his options carefully before speaking.

"Jason Todd, you'll be the death of I swear."

Jason winced, a little hurt, but waited to respond on the off chance that Dick had more to say. He did.

"I'll be right over."

Two quiet sobs broke their way from Jason's lips, and just when he'd expected Dick to hang up, he continued talking instead.

"Jay, I'll be right there. I promise."

The line went dead before Jason's fogged mind could fully process those words.

_What was he supposed to say once Dick got there?_

_Should he apologize?_

_Why had they even been fighting in the first place?_

Yeah, those were all valid questions. But Jason didn't actually have any of the answers.

He sat there for a while, having shifted at some point to seat himself next to the pile of glass, his back still flat against the wall. He sat there for a long time actually, so long that he was starting to think Dick wasn't gonna show up, that this was all a sick joke and he was probably laughing about it somewhere with the rest of their siblings. Jason's hands moved to tug on his own hair.

_Shouldn't have called._

_Too late now._

_He probably just hates me more._

_Kind of expected that._

_I didn't-_

The ex-Robin was shaken out of his thoughts by a soft knock on the door, but he heard it open before he even had the chance to try and answer it. Right, Dick had a key.

"Jason?"

Dick was still in the other room, but fuck, his voice alone felt like one of the best and worst things Jason had ever heard.

"In here."

He took a second to silently congratulate himself for managing decent words this time. Maybe he'd seem like less of an idiot now.

A fresh wave of sobs shook through the boy's chest when Dick rounded the corner and met his eyes.

"God little wing, what'd you do to yourself?"

“I broke; did some stupid shit. Nothing too unusual”

“Yeah I can see that,”

A brief pause.

“You’re bleeding”

Jason only nodded, glancing down at his hand in slight disgust.

“Come here, let’s take care of that”

In all honesty, Jason didn’t want to worry about his hand. He wanted to cling to Dick and sob into his chest. He wanted to apologize profusely and then down another bottle of whatever sort of alcohol he had handy.

Instead, he nodded and stood up.

Dick didn’t approach him, he knew better than that. What he did do was wait patiently for his boyfriend to move across the room. Jason watched helplessly as he took his left hand, cradling it gently and examining the small gash on the outer side.

“I don’t think you need stitches, just a bandage”

“I really don’t even need that...”

He hadn’t called so Dick would come over and play doctor for him. In all honesty, Jason wasn’t sure what he had called for exactly, but it certainly wasn’t this. He visibly cringed at the sigh that escaped Dick’s mouth; it wasn’t a happy sigh at all.

“Look, Jason, I’m still upset with you. And we’re definitely talking about all this later, when you’re sober. But I- I shouldn’t have walked out like that. I’m sorry.”

_Wait, Dick was apologizing?_

No, this wasn’t how this was supposed to go. Jason was supposed to be the one muttering apologies, explaining that he was wrong, and that he could do better. What could Dick possibly have to apologize for?

“We were both wrong here little wing, it takes two to start a fight”

Of course the Boy Wonder could read his damn mind.

Dick was still holding Jason’s hand softly, nudging his elbow as well and using the touch to gently guide him to the bed, their bed.

Jason didn’t-couldn’t- bring himself to say a word as he watched Dick move to the bathroom and back, bandages in hand, and a soft smile on his lips. Not a joyful smile, but a sympathetic one. Dick didn’t fill the silence either, didn’t even seemed to be bothered by it, as he secured the gauze around his boyfriend’s hand.

“There you go Jay, all fixed. Just don’t throw any more glass within the next week or so and you should be alright”

It was a joke, or a sad attempt at one, but the atmosphere was still heavy as another tear made its way down Jason’s cheek. He wiped at it quickly, hoping Dick hadn’t seen. He had.

“Come here, you big sap”

Jason froze as Dick’s arms opened, clearly gesturing for him to settle between them. It was general protocol for when he was upset; Dick would offer the support he wanted but couldn’t ask for, and Jason would accept it, simple as that.

But this time, he didn’t lean into the familiar place against Dick’s chest. No, instead he pushed himself forward, using his knees as leverage, and pressed his mouth against his boyfriend's. Dick tensed for a moment, but didn’t pull back, eventually melting into the motion himself.

“-love you” The words were quiet, nearly nonexistent, as Jason whispered them against Dick’s lips.

“We’re still talking about this lat-“ The sentence was cut short as Jason connected their lips again, nodding his head when he pulled back.

“I know. We can. I just- love you”

Only then, did Dick offer up a truly genuine ‘Dick Grayson’ smile.

“I love you too Jason, you should probably get some sleep before you end up with a killer hangover”

There was a brief flash of fear in Jason’s eyes, but it began to fade as he spoke up again.

“Will you stay?”

Dick leaned forward, pulling them both down onto the mattress as cautiously as he could manage. Jason immediately curled up against his chest, obviously unaffected by being the physically larger of the two. But he kept his eyes locked on Dick expectantly, still waiting for an answer.

_Would he stay?_

“Of course, little wing,”

He paused to place a soft kiss on Jason’s forehead before adding,

“I wouldn’t dream of leaving again”

**Author's Note:**

> This is by far not the first fic I've ever written, but it is the first one I'm posting which adds a little pressure to it. I wrote this a couple years back and it was mainly just a vent piece to blow off some steam and fill a need for JayDick angst, but I'm quite proud of it :)


End file.
